Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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