im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
