In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
