Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
