Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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