Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
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