brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
