I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
