i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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