This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
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