Texts From Last Night

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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?

  (408): View more from California

  oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no

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  (480): I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy? (408): oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no http://tfl.nu/w6ll
  Replies (4) Good night (1039) Bad night (3062)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them

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  (617): were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them http://tfl.nu/uwjn
  Replies (56) Good night (4809) Bad night (553) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.

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  (405): I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat. http://tfl.nu/2u5h
  Replies (17) Good night (2393) Bad night (856) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  so... thinking about masturbating finally

  (661): View more from California

  taking the losers way out I see

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  (818): so... thinking about masturbating finally (661): taking the losers way out I see http://tfl.nu/lnxg
  Replies (14) Good night (520) Bad night (2658)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.

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  (973): I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance. http://tfl.nu/0bj8
  Replies (13) Good night (4139) Bad night (751) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say

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  (516): My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say http://tfl.nu/znzu
  Replies (32) Good night (1779) Bad night (5062) Order T-Shirt
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  (941): View more from Florida

  She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???

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  (941): She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina??? http://tfl.nu/hnyt
  Replies (24) Good night (1071) Bad night (7825) Order T-Shirt
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.

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  (618): Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil. http://tfl.nu/vn3b
  Replies (3) Good night (1416) Bad night (1825) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis

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  (203): apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis http://tfl.nu/rw8g
  Replies (2) Good night (4333) Bad night (560) Order T-Shirt
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  (646): View more from New York

  just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.

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  (646): just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice. http://tfl.nu/48r0
  Replies (4) Good night (3313) Bad night (679) Order T-Shirt
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  (323): View more from California

  they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(

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  (323): they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:( http://tfl.nu/6gfx
  Replies (3) Good night (660) Bad night (2576) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"

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  (619): We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober" http://tfl.nu/gqaj
  Replies (9) Good night (7125) Bad night (907) Order T-Shirt
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.

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  (586): I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins. http://tfl.nu/rkqp
  Replies (2) Good night (720) Bad night (258)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven

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  (215): Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven http://tfl.nu/y2y3
  Replies (3) Good night (696) Bad night (215) Order T-Shirt
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  (801): View more from Utah

  I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me

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  (801): I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me http://tfl.nu/6usl
  Replies (8) Good night (1374) Bad night (119) Order T-Shirt

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