i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
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Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
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Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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