i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
