There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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