Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
