We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Randomize
