Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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