was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
