that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
