Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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