dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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