I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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