Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
