do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
