I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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