i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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