YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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