I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Randomize
