We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Randomize
