wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
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