so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I love you. Go after that dick
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