so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
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He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
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It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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