so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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