I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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