I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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