He is such a slut. More and more my type.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
