Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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