I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
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Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
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Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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