She's JV to your varsity
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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