plz talk dirty to me
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
