Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
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