just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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