i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
