Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
