Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize