Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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