Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
