eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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