somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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