Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Non-Jews are for practice
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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