Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize